Life in the Balance: A Physician's Memoir of Life, Love, and Loss with Parkinson's Disease and Dementia

By now what might be called the deadly-disease memoir is a standard literary genre: the successful, happy man or woman laid low by a fatal ailment, soldiering on against all odds. Thomas Graboys' new book about living with Parkinson's disease silences cynicism about yet another entry into the sweepstakes. Besides being a man of much more than average gifts, material wealth, looks and success, he writes from the perspective of someone whose entire identity was shaped by being a medical doctor, a brilliant cardiologist, someone whose life's work was to take care of others. All this is now lost to him and he admits, with frequently bruising candor, the emotional cost to him and his family.

Dr. Graboys' particular case of Parkinson's, as he explains, involves actual dementia, and although the book was written with the aid of a co-author, nevertheless the signs of mental difficulty are evident in the short-windedness and occasional repetitiveness of the writing. Several dozen pages are devoted not to Graboys' own writing but to passages contributed by his siblings, his children and their in-laws, passages the author did not screen in advance of their inclusion. What would be defects in another book here are in themselves touching, clear evidence of the author's ongoing struggle to maintain some sense of self-worth and productivity. He does not spare himself, dissecting in painful detail the ravages his progressive disease, and his occasional denial of its seriousness, has inflicted on his second marriage. (He did not reveal to his spouse at the time of his wedding that he was already suffering from Parkinson's, and it is perhaps significant that his wife does not contribute any writing of her own.) By the end of this volume the reader is shattered, drained, but also moved and uplifted by Dr. Graboys' resilience and optimism in the face of the darkest odds.

I was inspired by reading Dr. Graboy's story. The one thing I found disconcerting was his continued driving. I know he wants his independence but even if he drives only to two local places he could injure himself or someone else on the way.

Fascinating memoir of the same illnes my relative is enduring. I intend to share this with everyone i know who has a loved one with lewy body dementia. We must all live life to the fullest now, while are brains are healthy. Dr. Graboys' story is one of how love and humanity are possible beyond that, long into this illness. Beautiful!

Tom Graboys offers sensitive and poignant insight into a devastating disease that afflicts millions as patients, family and caregivers. Being married to a fellow academic physician, world renowned and respected, who suffers from Parkinsonism, I miss my spouse's wise counsel as the "go-to"- person described by Graboys, who continues to be a comforting, wise healer. This book fills that gap a bit by honestly describing the agony of the disease and how to cope with certain loss of self as previously known.

Any general-interest library or health collection needs LIFE IN THE BALANCE: A PHYSICIAN'S MEMOIR OF LIFE, LOVE, AND LOSS WITH PARKINSON'S DISEASE AND DEMENTIA. The author is both a doctor and patient, at the peak of his career at age forty-nine when he was diagnosed with an aggressive form of Parkinson's and dementia. His memoir is revealing and insightful - and considers Parkinson's from the rare vantage point of both patient and doctor.

Diane C. Donovan
California Bookwatch