How To Lose Friends And Alienate People: A Memoir

I hadn't read this book for a while, and I saw it laying on the floor, and I picked it up. I read the whole thing agian. It was brilliant. For anyone who has wroked in New York and worked in publishing, these stories have a ring of truth to them. Lizzie Grubman is a creep. Tina Brown is a creep. Most of these shady magazine characters have very little redeeming qualities. They have no soul. They will have to deal with their empty lives down the road. Toby Young is funny because he believed in the myth of America. Sure there are rags to riches stories all the time. More often there is not. Toby Young is a valid writer. This book should be read over most of the crap that is being published right now.

As an avid reader of V.F. I was intrigued by the premise of the book but was ultimately disappointed. Despite the book's self-deprecating title, it's obvious the writer thinks of himself as extremely clever and witty. He repeats rather boring conversations he has with not-so funny people ad nauseum - he's that guy at the party who always steals other people's jokes and then screws up the punchline. Regardless, it's an easy read and it's interesting to get someone's take on "celebrity" journalists like Graydon Carter and Candace Bushnell.

I sort of enjoyed this book, even laughed out loud once. The thing is, this book ought to be a good 100 pages shorter, there's too much "in"fo. It's reads more like an expose than a memoir. Let's put it this way: there are footnotes. I am not anti-footnotes, at all, but come on... when books actually need footnotes they're shot down by editors but this fluff gets fluffnotes?? Anyway I did appreciate Young's musings on America and New York; it's sort of an antidote to Sex and the City, which is refreshing (ie, the city is not that sexy). I did finish it and appreciated parts of it, and reading about the underdog is always rewarding, but if you're not an avid reader just have a friend point out the witty parts and leave the buying to those with more money to waste.

This book is a send up of the high fashion world of Vanity Fair. It does a good job showing how ridiculous it is to work there.

The narrator is so self effacing through the whole thing he makes his jabs at others easy to take.

Toby tries to make us feel sorry for his alienation in NYC and with women. However since he wants to be with a supermodel, be friends with celebrities and be with the "in" crowd this feels false. Anyone would probably feel left out if that was their goal. (Unless they were rich, incredibly good looking or had "made it" in that world)

He also wants us to feel sorry for his bad luck with women but he loses his audience when he practically admits all he wants is a woman with big breasts. Not a relationship or a connection with someone.

His bitter critique of NYC and America compared to Britain also rings false because he is only seeing things from being "left out" of this A-list group. He didn't try to really find real friends or connections in the city. He just tried to get into A-list events and parties.

It's true that this unreal world deserves to be critisized and the case he makes about publicists ruling the magazines is VERY convincing.

A good read but seems like it was written as revenge for being fired and for never being allowed "in" to the A-list crowd he so desperately was seeking.

Young is no hero. He is not even a nice guy. He IS however hilariously self-aware. If this book were fiction, you might think it was simply absurd. However, it is all true as Young tells us in the end. I have admit, despite the many negative reviews, that I enjoyed this book. Young's complete inability to be anything but honest about himself and his failings is winning. I sat there in pain several times (who hires a stripper on take your daughter to work day?!) and especially as he discussed how he won his wife's heart. Many of things he says about New York and our American society are dead on. Somethings are may not be so cut and dry. However, his Oxford background shows as he analyzes our culture using sources ranging from TS Eliot to Gore Vidal to Tina Brown to Byron (and lest we not forget Ben Hecht who is quoted every 10 pages!). Not perfect, not always nice, but honest. YOu don't get that so much these days. And congrats Young, whatever you are doing now.