The Boomer Burden: Dealing with Your Parents' Lifetime Accumulation of Stuff

Some things we just can't put on the back shelf, but before we all die we somehow manage to fill shelves . . . tons of them. Have you noticed, as a Baby Boomer, the sheer amount of clutter and junk in your parent's home? Your own? Chances are you don't have anything that would make an appraiser shout for joy on Antique Roadshow, but the local junk dealer might be happy as a clam to get some of it. In the event your parents become unable to live in their home due to disability or pass away you might just be taking a much closer look than you planned on. According to Julie Hall, author of the fabulous book, The Boomer Burden: DEALING WITH YOUR PARENTS' LIFETIME ACCUMULATION OF STUFF, you're going to be hit by a "flying brick." It isn't going to be a pretty sight.

When we Boomers were in our twenties, we all felt we were invincible. Nah, we're all going to live forever and nothing will happen to mom and dad. Think again. As Hall bluntly states, "even Lipitor won't keep your parents alive forever." The resulting estate, however palatial or humble . . . well, you gotta deal with it, like it or not. Known as "The Estate Lady," Julie has a great deal of experience and claims she can help the reader "clear out your parents' estate in seven to ten days." Sage advice includes dealing with the appointment of a legal representative, division of the estate, identity and appraisal of potential valuable items, how to minimize sibling rivalry, how to deal with those little skeletons in the closet, vultures and much more. The Boomers, now finding themselves sandwiched between caring for aging parents and their own children and grandchildren can use all the help they can get in times of crisis!

I was amazed by the originality, depth and usefulness of this book. I was literally burning the midnight oil trying to get to the end of this book. The topic and usefulness span generations and is a marvelous resource for not only the Boomer, but also an excellent preparation guide for the parent who wishes to ease the clutter conundrum for their children. This book can be a gift of love between generations and should not be overlooked.

Deb Fowler (Roundtable Reviews)

Looks like a good book with lots of helpful information in dealing with the daunting task of cleaning out your parents house. I'm sure we will get some good use out of this book.

I'm at that age where sometime in the foreseeable future, I'm going to have to deal with the passing of one or more parents in our family. In addition to the grieving process, there's something that often doesn't get discussed until it's too late... what do you do with all the "stuff" your parents have accumulated over their lifetime? Julie Hall has made a career of working through that process with people, and she's written a book called The Boomer Burden: Dealing with Your Parents' Lifetime Accumulation of Stuff. Even though it may not be a subject you want to think about, time spent reading The Boomer Burden now can lead to infinitely fewer headaches and fractured relationships when that time comes. And if you're the parent, reading and acting on the information here is one of the best gifts you can give to your children.

Contents:
Introduction: Leaving Behind More Than Memories
First Signs
Planning for the Inevitable
Where's the Will?
When Reality Sinks In
The Hearse Doesn't Have a Trailer Hitch
Relatively Speaking
Scammers, Schemers, and Other Scoundrels
The Nitty-Gritty of Dividing Your Parents' Estate
But What Is It Really Worth?
Where Do I Begin?
How to Clean Out Your Parents' Estate
Right, Wrong, and In Between
I Will Never Do This to My Kids!
Be Good to Yourself
Mission Accomplished!
Appendix A: Your Complete Parent Care Checklist
Appendix B: Helpful Resources
Appendix C: Documents and Information to Locate
Appendix D: Sample Wish List Spreadsheet
Notes
About the Author

Hall has a business called The Estate Lady, and she brings 17 years of experience to this often ignored (but inevitable) part of life. She documents in painful detail how normal families can turn into dishonest, contentious enemies over the process of clearing out and dividing up the contents of the parents' estate. It's also quite normal for "friends" to want to help out with the process, but those friends often help themselves to items when no one is looking. Add antique dealers and consignment agents on top of that, and valuable keepsakes can wander out the door for pennies on the dollar, often before you even know what happened. Hall has a process which helps you make difficult decisions beforehand (when emotions aren't running high), as well as steps to follow which makes the process of emptying the house something which doesn't have to be completely overwhelming. She also counsels parents to take the time beforehand to make a will, record where all the important papers are, and to list out any items of value and who they would want them to go to when they die. These simple acts can make all the difference in the world to the survivors who have to sort it all out.

It's tempting to think that your family will be one of the 20% (yes, it's that low) that smoothly handles this unfortunate event. Odds are, you won't be. While I'm not in the position of having Depression-era parents who saved EVERYTHING, there's still "stuff" that will have to be handled when that time comes for me. Based on the information in this book, I know I'll be in a much better position to do the right things than I would have been without it. I would recommend this book be standard reading material for anyone over the age of 35. Trust me, you'll need it at some point...

Written by: Julie Hall
Published by: Thomas Nelson
Reviewed by: Stephanie Rollins for ReviewYourBook.com 11/2008
ISBN: 978-0-7852-2825-7
"Handbook to Dealing With Aging Parents" 4 stars
I thought that this book was pertaining only to the "lifetime accumulation of stuff". It is not. It is about protecting your aging parents and their stuff. I am so appalled that there are people who prey on the elderly's innocence; however, there are.
This does tell you how to handle the estate. Julie Hall is, afterall, The Estate Lady. It tells you how to approach the subject with your family, to prepare for war (most estates end up that way), and how to prepare your estate.
This book should be part of your estate planning. This has everything you need in a conversational, enjoyable read.

Helpful information, targeted accurately at the Boomers who need it. A sincere presentation of valuable information from a professional who is willing to share the experience she has gathered over many years in the business of helping families during times of sadness and distress. Written with empathy and understanding for the issues the Boomer Generation is facing. Well worth the money.