Beyond Consequences, Logic, and Control: A Love-Based Approach to Helping Attachment-Challenged Children With Severe Behaviors

I have read everything out there on attachment, and tried it all on my kids. After I bought this book and "tried it" I never bought or read another. I continue to study this approach and my children are absolutely thriving. Previously I would have predicted I would be murdered in my sleep when they are teenagers, now I have two wonderful sons and a happy family. Please read this book! The answers are here. Your children can heal and they are worth it! And you are worth it!

As a mother of two adopted children, one from birth and the other from a Russian orphanage, this book was a REVELATION, and the first of its kind! I can't even number the helpful books I have read on adoption and attachment, but this one truly understands the child from his/her perspective and life experiences. It just makes perfect sense. However, the work does not stop here. The authors encourage us parents of challenging children to look deeper within ourselves. Until we begin to heal of our own past wounds, we can not fully be present in theirs.

This book offers practical ideas for loving our children where they hurt. I see my children differently now, but not only them but everyone I know, including myself. This book is NOT just for attachment-challenged children, but any child with ongoing issues, adopted or biological! And tell me, who doesn't have issues???

This book is a MUST READ for any parent who is raising a child in the 21st Century who pushes our "hot buttons" from time to time, or like me, on a daily basis! And a MUST READ for all child psychologists and social workers!

The authors, however, do not stop at just helping us with their insightful wisdom and knowledge. They invite us to attend an all-day seminar with them for FREE! I can't wait to attend one near where we live and bring all my new questions and have them answered, personally!

This book puts relationship before performance,which in my way of thinking, is unconditional love. Is there anything more important than relationship? We don't want "robot children." We want children who can feel and connect in meaningful ways with others, beginnning with their parents. In a word, this book communicates grace-based technniques.

This is a must read for foster parents and pre/post adoptive parents who have attachment deficit children who have also suffered trauma. The authors have years of experience with such children and have had great success in helping the children and parents facilitate a deeper relationship. Understanding the child and how to effectively do what it takes to help the child heal is everything! Behavior is just a symptom; find out how to help the child move from fear and shame into love.

I bought this book for a class book review and I couldn't be more thankful. I loved the love-based approach. The book is set up in a very fast, easy, and understandable format. The first part of the book is about the brain and what memory is responsible for our reactions to daily situations. The next part of the book is about different behaviors that children exhibit and how the traditional view approaches the behavior and the love based approach approaches the behavior. This is the best part of the seven chapters. There is a scenario and then two columns of one side tradiotional and the other love-based. There is also a chapter for parents that explains why parents react to the behaviors that their children exhibit. The last part of the book is real-life stories from families that are using the love-based approach. I really have changed since reading this book and have applied it to children that I work with. Although this book is geared toward children with severe attachment disorders I found this to be applicable for all children. Please read this book its worth the twenty dollars.